Sunday, February 7, 2016

So Let's Get Our Live's in Order Now Shall We?

One of the biggest struggles I see women facing today is complete and utter overwhelm. We are exhausted. We are overworked. We are behind on everything and we don't know why. This is what I finally did. I finally sat down and made a list of everything I needed to do. I carried that list with me everywhere I went until everything I could possibly think of was on it... ie.. I really want to clean out our shed, I would like a little time for our yard, my back room is a nightmare, I really need to find some time to exercise, I miss going out every so often just for a fun lunch date, I wonder how Suzy is, I missed his birthday again, oh no!.. etc etc.. 
 
Then I made a list of priorities. This was the huge revelation in my own life. I made a list of the most important things I would like to be able to do in the course of a day and the amount of time I would like to have for them. My list may be different than yours but it was transforming for me. 
 
I thought of when I'd been happier. I had some leisure in the day to walk and peacefully reflect. I had time to groom. I had time to good and do the dishes so I wasn't always feeling guilty about disarray. I had time to sleep without bags under my eyes. 
 
I had TIME. I do believe that if we were home. This wouldn't be such a struggle for us loves. I just don't. I truly  believe that women entering the workplace ended up being a big backlash that has hurt us terribly in so many ways. The rare woman who has no family is fine and well to do. But women with no families worked then too. The rest of us, with homes, families and such to care for are now burdened with 40 hours taken each week (not including the drive) and families we just can't keep up with. Not to mention the horrible guilt we feel for it. And love lives? They are dreadful as we surely don't have time to groom.
 I ended up after writing this blog having to go into the workforce rather full time. In fact, I began working 60+ hours a week and the blog... well we all know that story. It's just sat here. and every time I see it, I cry. My life is the perfect reflection of everything I had blogged about. Every reason that I wrote for not working full time is now  a painful reality. I gained 20 lbs. My grooming came to a halt. I rarely if ever walk, my dishes are usually half a sink full and my home, my beautiful home just sits reminding me of what it could be. 
So I sat down and wrote down the things I did at such time that made my home so amazing. It was time dolls. time. I would try to devote time to blog and do my course because it was such a passion for me. I didn't want to let it go. And my love would get angrier with me for not being there around the home so it just stopped. It had to. I believed family came first and it stopped. But my family fell apart. BECAUSE I began to work again. I wasn't sleeping. I was wearing myself ragged, getting no sleep and the beautiful perky me that slept and groomed and kept a lovely home fell apart. 
Women who don't keep homes are not lazy. They are simply over extended or without direction. I truly believe that. 
 
I want you to sit down and make your own list of everything you need to do. List everything you have put off, everything you ache for... perhaps to plan a vacation.. perhaps getting your nails done. Do you ache to work out more. Do you ache to plant a lovely garden. Do you long for the romance you once had and the time to groom to get yourself back to it? Because we fell apart, men began to disrespect us. We need to accept that fact that we took on too much dolls and we fell apart. 
It is hurting our health. It is hurting our homes. It is hurting everything. 

As you make your priority list of things you would like time for each day.... the things that truly mean so much to you. Consider what you've been doing in their place... was it truly worth it?
The wages of women now are literally almost non existent. Does the amount you make truly earn more than the cost of childcare, eating out to accommodate not being home, gasoline etc?
Just like a profit and loss statement... figure it. 
 
Women DO have brains... something they have pretended NOT to have in recent years but we do. We have brilliant minds. It is NOT necessary to pretend you don't to impress men. Use those minds to organize your life now.
How much do you earn? Now subtract how much you 'spend' to earn it. Include childcare costs, vehicle and gasoline costs, housekeeping, business attire costs, meals eaten out instead of in the home, school lunches instead of home packed lunches etc etc etc..even the cost of having less connection emotionally in the home.
Most of you would literally break even.
Do you  have time to groom like the woman above?

Then you are WORKING TOO HARD. And your husband does NOT love you more for it. Tomorrow, do less and groom... note how your husband suddenly finds you 'less' lazy.
 

A secret I've learned..... LAZY in men talk.....means ungroomed.
If you are ungroomed or unkempt, your man will call you lazy or a lazy 'slob' as some have been so cruel to do.
The more you do, the more 'lazy' you will become as you will become less and less groomed.
Think of a man who smells, has dirty hair, dirty clothes.. grimy teeth ... honestly.. what does he appear to you?   Lazy.
That is how men see a woman who fails to groom. and no amount of working harder will fix it.
Only one thing will.
Taking time to groom. which is honeslty a treat for yourself. Take it. First thing each morning.. groom. 
Take an hour and groom. Use pretty makeup. Enjoy it as you did when you were single Quit feeling guilty for it. 
 
There are ways. Ways for you to be home again. So I want you to make a list. What would you like to do 'if' you had the time to do it? For me, it was clearly blogging. I missed it dearly and simply keeping the home like I had been. I wanted that morning time I'd had each day to reflect and plan my day. I wanted the time back to groom and walk and exercise. I wanted time to prepare meals each day.  I wanted time to plan amazing meals. I wanted time to decorate, plan a wardrobe and keep up with my home and life.  I wanted time for parties and events and family. I wanted a home I could feel so good about again because I was taking such dear care of those I love. 
*1950's housewife..not so when I grew up.  We lived on a dairy farm and we had the old black cook stove and dresses were worn for special occasions..   WPV:
Having lived both. I see the difference. When we made less, we were SO much happier. I have gained NOTHING from working full time. Absolutely nothing. Nothing but debt, stress and a lack of time. I was happier with less. I was happy having time to lay out under stars at night, to walk and pick flowers, to make lovely meals and decorate and make grocery lists. I had time to read and plan each morning. I had time to groom and exercise. I had time. 
I didn't have an alarm clock and I rarely looked at a computer.

 A happy homemaker showing off her wonderful new dishwasher. #vintage #1950s #kitchen #dishwasher #ad #homemaker #housewife:
Our meals were amazing. Every day I dived into cookbooks from the 50's and before. I adored it. 
I wanted it back. And I am determined to get it back. And I believe you can too.

Being at home is not being a slave or  doormat. Women are still expected to care for the family and it's natural. It's what we long TO do. Just as men desire to do the more manly things.... They are proud of their hammers and work trucks and 'man' jobs. And the men that desire to be women are quite proud of everything that is being a woman... so why aren't women? Why do we act as if being a woman or being proud of womanly tasks is something to be ashamed of? What on earth for? Our bodies were not made for men's work.. so naturally the more delicate tasks would be ours. We were created with exceptional beauty.. why be ashamed of that?
 Image result for 1950s lovely home
The women is the most beautiful of all of God's creations............. and I don't care if you are a size 2 or a size 20.. you are amazingly beautiful. Your skin is soft, your features delicate, you were created to be beautiful. Don't deny yourself that right. You are the more delicate creature... like fine china.. the tasks you do 'should' be less strenuous... that is not to be ashamed of. That is beautiful. Why on earth do you desire to do men's work? 
I used to look at the cows in the farm I was at and laugh so hard as they would reach to each the brown grass on the other side of the fence when they were in a yard full of greener grass. We are just as silly desiring to be like men or deny what we have been blessed with. 
LET yourself be more delicate. LET yourself be lovely. Enjoy being the more delicate creature. 
Quit being silly and thinking it is more desirable for a woman to be manly.
Why on earth would any lovely woman want to be seen as manly at all? It makes no sense loves. Quit denying your femininity. 
Quit allowing men to run you ragged. 
It's time to be a lady again.
A lady will care for herself even if the man in her life won't. It is what is best for you and your family.
You need to start putting the needs of your home first.
My list was as simple as this:
time to groom each day 1 hour
time to make breakfast and dinner and clean up after 2 hours
time to clean my home each day 2 hours
Time to sit, reflect and plan, budget, pay bills, etc 1 hour
Time for necessary errands 1 hour
Time for physical activity 1 hour
8 hours sleep
Time for LEISURE... ?  Whatever you need to truly have time to be a 'lady' and care for the health of you and your home... this needs to come first doll. It IS a glamorous position.
Then it was a matter of subtracting the total from 24... THAT is the time you have left to work dolls. 
That and only that. Yes your man can expect you to work if necessary but I truly believe it shouldn't be. But put your homes first. Figure the hours you truly have to work. and if you have the ability to work from home.... DO SO. 
WE can undo the women's movement. IT just takes a single step to honor women again.
We are not respected anymore. We have been over worked and under appreciated. Take the steps to undo this now.

Do you really think she was 'less' respected than we are now adays?

When you truly add up what you desire.. it is more hours than you likely realize. The reason your home isn't like a perfect housewife's....because you fell into the trap of society and took on more than you should have and now your home has come last. You are at work each day... but your home... is falling apart. 
 
If you don't have the time to keep your home adorably.... you are working TOO much.

Not only that...but home has ceased to 'be' home with women out. Homes that were cozy with inviting smells and delicate decor have been replaced by sterile buildings that nobody lives in.
Often untouched for months at a time. Everyone comes home to sleep but otherwise, they are rarely touched. They sit empty most days. 
 
The homes I see on hoarders and the like are terrible. Most have homes they could never imagine having company in and most women are in a stress every night trying to figure out what to put on the table. 
Watching our waistline is not even happening anymore and because we are eating nothing but premade meals, our waistlines are expanding terribly at unhealthy levels. We are killing ourselves. 
The cure... TIME TO COOK. TIME TO BE HOME. 
When you cook, cook a balanced diet. Included grains, fruits, vegetables, dairy, healthy unprocessed meats and water.
A large part of your day needs to be fruits and vegetables. Not the small unhealthy portions of vegetables that come in Tv dinners and fast food meals.. HEALTHY vegetable servings. 

You will feel better. Note the size of her dinner plate... not much larger than the salad bowl... That is proper loves. Balance your meal. You will spend less on healtchcare costs. Your family will be healthier. 
If you began to make healthy meals with vegetables, fruits, whole grains etc in them... with an occasional small dessert  (Tiny portion each meal) in them, diabetes would not be a problem. sweets need to be treated like a small delicious luxury AFTER  you have become adequately full from the vegetables and fruits grains and meats in your meal.
Plan out  your week this week. Think of what you 'want' or long for in your life. What do you need time for. How are you going to make this time?

I have decided NOT to charge for my course. I have decided to, however, offer an option for others to support me though the products offered on my page. I believe the products are amazing. I do believe they will pay me for the time I spend here. 
 
Plan your week. Plan your time. Eliminate things you just don't need. Plan your priorities FIRST. Priorities in your home and for you as a woman. For your health and well being. THEN fit in the rest. 

I believe in you!
Much love
Veronique
 

 

3 comments:

  1. I am so glad you are blogging again! These lessons have really changed my life. Thank you for what you are doing. Please keep up the great work! I can't wait for what comes next. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Here is an interesting video that one can say is a reflection of modern society. The title of the video is Men not Marrying? How Far Does the 'Problem' Go?

    https://youtu.be/rlvMAS_20K4

    ReplyDelete
  3. Here is also an interview with the same woman (Karen Straughan) talking about the same issues on a podcast. All her videos are pretty interesting too.

    https://youtu.be/YzNN42bJUkw

    ReplyDelete

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