Wednesday, December 11, 2013

As Christmas Approaches

I have been pondering what to write about today. At this time of year, some of you are more motivated than ever. Something about the Christmas season brings life to your home and you are captivated by the lights.
 And then, there are the rest of you. Those that are alone. Those that are hurting. Those that are ill. Those that are cold. All with heartache. I know how hard this time of year can be. I know the ache of each Christmas movie and the way you just want to avoid Christmas songs when this is you. I want to encourage you to find your peace this season. If you can't jump for joy over the Christmas season, find another form of peace. In such cases, I actually recommend avoiding things that will bring heartache. Don't focus on things that will trigger painful memories. Instead of sitting in your home missing those gone, get out... take a walk.. find a new activity. Find an escape in something that won't trigger heartache. If the heartache overwhelms, pour it out... to a friend, a notebook or God. Release and breathe. This too shall pass.
 
 
Life is full of seasons. Some so full of joy that their absence brings a pain so unbearable. But there is music in the balance and good times will come again.
Find time to reach out to those you love this season. Find time to be thankful for what you have.
Find time to be grateful for the memories.
and find time to yourself to reflect.
One of my favorite things to do as the holidays approach is review the last year.
What goals did you have when it started? How did it turn out? What changes if any do you wish you had made and what things are you so grateful for?

This is the perfect time to scrapbook your year... to write journals recapping your memories and putting them in a book for future generations. This is the time to clean that spare room. This is that time to let go of the painful reminders. This is that time to welcome peace and release pain.
And this is the time to find love.
This month has been such a huge one for me. It's been a reminder that we aren't just dealing with our feelings in this world. We are dealing with flesh and blood. Every action you make affects another. Every single one.

So often we get caught up in our feelings that we may open or close doors that can really hurt another person.
Who are you hurting today? Who are you loving today? What affect are you having on the Christmas of another? Are you the reason someone is lonely?
If you have children, what kind of Christmas are you giving them?
If you have a husband, do you give him a Christmas to remember?

What kind of atmosphere do you create in your home.
If you are not thinking of these things, it will be too late before you know it.
Now is the time to make memories.
Now is the time to show love.

There is no guarantee of tomorrow but there is always today.
Love those God gave you. Cherish their feelings. Care for them.
Stand by them.
Enjoy the holidays. I will make a definite attempt to be on much more often.
Much love,
V

Monday, December 2, 2013

Setting Your Priorities

It's amazing to me how as a writer, I am so quiet in other ways. 

 When my soul needs to speak, it does prefer the written word. I'll feel a tug at my heartstrings and out it all pours. I used to see it as a fault, a flaw. Where others could write one paragraph, for me, it would be a page. It was the way I was different. The thing others told me to change of myself. But deep down, it was who I was ...and I learned to accept it.   

 Over my life, it is my writing that has defined me. It is my writing that has saved me. And when I pray, it is often a long romantic letter to
God. It is my favorite form of expression. It is my soul.
 I have been learning so much this week about personal identity. How much I let others at times, decide just about everything for me. When I do rise up to make my own decisions, I often feel guilty. I am actually usually discouraged. I am even afraid to write some of the things I long to do as family wouldn't agree. One of those being culinary arts My love aside from writing. I can tend to try so hard to please everyone that I please no one. I have literally almost married a man I didn't love, lived for years where I didn't want to live, worked where I didn't want to work, even followed a diet I didn't want to follow... simply from inability to say no. When a day came that I looked at everything I'd written down to do each evening and not gotten to that morning, it became clear to me. I was putting off my needs until I'd met everyone else's. I tried to put everyone else first to a fault. I never got to me. I also habitually accepted everything and had far too much on my plate.
 Where it seems it would be so generous, I end up failing everyone miserably and denying myself far too much sleep. There are only so many hours in a day after all. It's hard for me to say no. My heart wants to do so much. Literally to the point of almost marrying someone I didn't even want to marry. I remember praying it would end and amazingly, someone else stopping it. But what if they hadn't? And years later, I'm the same. I wait for a rescue instead of just living the way I feel is right for me. I try too hard to please. too hard to not offend. I think it goes back to living for Him or others.

 Obviously we're not going to be much for Him, if we're living for Joe... or Sally or whomever it may be. I don't think we even realize how much we are doing that. Each day, look at what you feel God calling you to. That has to be priority number one after time with Him. Then, look at everything else you were planning to do...write it all down. Now, make a few columns. 1) things I'm doing because I don't want to let someone down 2) things I'm doing because I actually long to do them 3) important things I need to do.

 It's all about 321. If you don't get to one, you're not meant to. Let it go. Live for Him. And everything else will work out. If that person is that upset about something you feel called to, you've got to learn to let them be upset. Live for God. Do what you know is right. With Him calling the shots, you're just fine.
Much love always, V